Category: Personal Growth

I decided to take a walk to a nearby store instead of driving. It was such a beautiful day, I thought I would take in some scenery and enjoy the sun on my skin. I usually take a purse everywhere I go. Today, however, I thought I would just grab my phone, keys and debit card, and head off.

I have been learning more about manifesting the things we want in life. As I was walking, I was reflecting on the fact about a week ago, something I desired to manifest still has not come to pass.

As I got closer to the store, I noticed two geese and three babies enjoying the day in a small reservoir. I just had to get a picture of this lovely little family. It was too cute to pass up! So, I put my debit card under my arm as I tried to get a good shot.

As I was doing so, I noticed a rain grid right where I was standing. I started thinking, “I need to be careful because I do not want my debit card to fall in.” I snapped the picture and was successful at not losing my card.

On my way back from the store, as I was walking across the parking lot in my apartment complex, the strangest thing happened: my debit card fell out of my hand, landed on top of a rain grid, balanced itself for a split second on the grill, then as I watched, plummeted down to the bottom.

I watched the whole thing unfold in amazement! How in the world could this have happened!!?? All I was doing was walking and holding my card. It was as if a force came and took my card from me and dropped it down in that dreaded place where just about 20 minutes earlier in a different location I was so mindful and careful of.

I tried to remain calm and thought about how I should go about this. I was determined to get my card out before calling the credit union to report it lost. An idea came to my mind: “I am going to loop packaging tape so the sticky side is exposed all the way around at the end of a broom handle and see if I can get it up that way.”

When I got in my apartment, I gathered the broom and tape and heading back over to the grid. As I sent the broom handle down to retrieve my card, I remained hopeful. The tape stood connected to the end of the broom handle and attached itself to my debit card. As I pulled the handle up, the card fell off the tape and fell back down. Uuuuggghh right when I thought I had it.

The idea was good! I was in need of stickier tape. As I was walking back toward my apartment, I saw my neighbor pull up. As he got out of his car, I greeted him, then proceeded to ask, “Do you have duck tape I could borrow?” He replied, “I do.”  Wheeeeww what a relief!

I got the duck tape, looped it on the end of the broom handle, went back to the grid, and voila! It was successful!! I had my card back in my hand!!!

As I walked back home, I was thinking how I was so worried about the exact instance happening back at the other location, however, it did not. What in the world made it happen now when it had no apparent reason to??!!

That is when I heard and felt the lesson: “you wonder why you have not manifested something you presented in thought and word a week ago? Maybe because you don’t truly believe that can happen for you as much as you believe losing your card down a rain grid can.”

Whoooooaaaa! I know I am not alone in this. I think we all have been programmed to believe it is easier for something negative to happen to us rather than positive. I had to go through all that to learn a lesson today. A very valuable one at that!

This tells me I still have work to do regarding my belief system. All the old thought patterns need to be undone in order to create a whole new world for myself. Otherwise, I am hindering all the many blessings out there waiting for me. This is a work to be put in daily practice to progress just like anything else. I have to keep exercising faith and changing my mind towards thoughts that work for me and not against me.

I do believe this transforming spiritual journey I am on, as well as staying calm when this event  happened, allowed me to be open enough to receive today’s lesson. Every day there is at least one lesson to learn, if not numerous. It is a matter of being open enough in our mind and heart to receive, and taking the time out to listen to make the connection.

Years ago I worked in a call center for less than a year. For anyone who has ever worked in that environment, you have coaching sessions with your supervisor telling you how you could do better. It seemed as if they never really focused on the good you did, instead, what you did not do right. I remember at the time feeling as though it seemed all that was discussed was what could be improved upon.

This may have been determined by each supervisor and their style of coaching; I don’t know. I personally believe in order to keep morale up, good things need to be discussed as well to balance it out. The point should not be to make someone feel low, however, build them up using true constructive criticism and not someone’s version of it.

Our ego tends to get in the way when we are told what needs to be improved, even when someone is saying it with the sweetest of words. We can get very defensive instead of seeing it to our advantage.

If our spirit is not open, we rather rebel against the topic because we feel we are giving our power away if we listen and change. We become defiant, feeling as if the other person is holding power over us, never taking into consideration how surrendering actually benefits us.

When we are being informed how to do better, it is best to take personal inventory of one’s self to see if there is any truth in what is being said. At times, it is a matter of someone else’s perception and opinion; in some personal circumstances, it could even be a manipulation tactic used by the other person. Most of the time, it is legitimate feedback.

We get so caught up in wanting to be perfect, we miss the personal growth aspect of what is being brought to our attention. No one is perfect! Although many like to think they are. We all have room to change ourselves for the better. As we continue to breathe and walk the earth, no one has reached the point of perfection. Becoming better and better everyday should be our focus. 

The next time something is being brought to your attention about yourself, rather than feeling like you want to deny and rebel against it, open yourself up and take time to reflect, seeing if there is any possible truth in the words spoken. You may even find that later you will thank the individual who was the vessel used by the Universe/God/Creator to add to your personal growth.

For extra income at the moment, I have been driving for Lyft. As a driver, when I am logged in and a ride comes through the app, I have the ability to accept or decline the request. Not much information comes through other than the name of the person requesting a ride and sometimes their picture so you know who to look for once you arrive.

When I accept a ride, I am only given the location the rider is to be picked up at. It is not until I pick them up I find out their destination. I could be going to Timbuktu for all I know, but, I accept ALL request because I am trying to make money!!

I was looking at my stats the other day. One of the the items listed is the acceptance rate, which mine is 100%. This is no surprise since I accept everything. Then came a burning question that held significance. I heard a voice ask me: What is YOUR acceptance rate? Wow! What is MY acceptance rate? Hmmmmmm

What have I allowed to come in my life on a daily basis, continually tapping accept when I really should have made the decision to hit decline instead? What have I allowed myself to accept due to a position I am in, or because I am second guessing myself; because I do not know how to say no, or my self-esteem may not be where it should be; not putting boundaries in place because maybe I don’t respect myself enough; or because I care for other people’s feelings more than my own, or I am unsure what to do; or because I am trying to keep peace with others ( yet while keeping peace with others I am robbing myself of internal peace, so either way there is no peace).

There are many more of these questions we can ask ourselves as we reflect inward regarding the garbage we allow in our lives on a daily basis. Just like the limited information that comes through to a Lyft driver before accepting a ride, we are oblivious to our acceptance rate of things we should not allow in our life.

Once we acknowledge the level of tolerance we’ve allowed that does not serve us, the next step is to understand the root cause, then change the course. Our desire to be open and true to ourselves will bring forth the answers through self-reflection that will provide the understanding needed to change. Then we need to find enough courage, love, self-respect and discernment to know what to accept and what to decline.

What is your acceptance rate?

Too often in life, something happens and we blame other people for us not being happy or satisfied or fulfilled. So the point is, we all have choices, and we make the choice to accept people or situations or to not accept situations.  

Tom Brady

The key to creating the mental space before responding is mindfulness. Mindfulness is a way of being present: paying attention to and accepting what is happening in our lives. It helps us to be aware of and step away from our automatic and habitual reactions to our everyday experiences.  

Elizabeth Thornton

If you read my post, New Year’s Resolutions, you will know I made this year my “year of challenge”. I really want to concentrate on stretching myself in ways I have not before, and going beyond ways I may have in the past; like when I trained the beginning of 2018 for a 20 mile bike ride held in Washington, DC., last May.

For the first time today, I took a HIIT class at the gym. For those of you who may not know, HIIT stands for High Intensity Interval Training. Do some research if you are unfamiliar. It is said to burn a very nice amount of body fat and continually burn fat for hours afterwards.

I have not been consistent with my workouts. I hate when I get off course. I feel my body has grown weaker with too many days off from strength training and cardio, which always frustrates me. You would think after feeling like I took a few steps back every time I fall short staying consistent with exercise I would not allow it to happen again, but I do! Vicious cycle I tell ya’!

I have taken exercise classes a million times in the past, but this one was a little different. I was a bit intimidated not knowing what to expect from the instructor or the fitness level of my classmates. I messed around here and there with HIIT in the extremely small gym in my apartment complex where no one would be able to see me struggling and looking awkward.

Now, I wanted to take an hour long class in the presence of others where the competition would push me harder than if I were alone, because as I look around seeing all those in class  who have surpassed me in strength and endurance, it is my reminder of the slack mode I have been in, which pisses me off enough to create a level of frustration that becomes the fuel I need to ignite the fire causing me to go like a bat out of hell!

For those of you who have never done HIIT before, it is no joke! You work your sweet petunias off! Watch some Youtube videos and you will get tired and sore just by watching. I walked into the classroom and there were both females and males of all ages. There were even two elderly women in class. I feel safe to use the word elderly because if I had to bet on it, I would definitely place them in the 65 or older category; maybe more like 70ish.

We warmed up, which was like a workout in itself, then we started the HIIT portion of the class which lasted for about 45 minutes. As we were working out, I realized there were all different fitness levels in class. The elderly ladies were taking advantage of modifying the exercises and then there was the teacher who looked like she was being shot out of a cannon, and the rest of us fell in between.

Then came the moment I was waiting for: class was over!!! Mission accomplished! I made it!! Was it easy? No! Did I struggle? YES! Did I do all the moves with power? No! Did I keep moving though? Yes!  Did I look and feel awkward? You bet!! Was anyone worried about me and how I looked? Probably not, because they were all in their own zone trying to complete the task at hand.

I stuck with it even when my steam was running out and gave what I had to give at the level I am currently at, knowing with each move I was in the process of becoming strong and better by sticking with it. My mood afterwards was uplifted and feeling better about myself just like when I completed the 20 mile bike ride I never would have given a thought of doing before being asked.

I commend the elderly women who had the guts to go in that class with the intensity level and not let it deter them. They did not care about keeping up with anyone; in fact, they modified almost all of the exercises to their ability, but they showed up and gave it what they had.  Showing up is usually half the battle. They were working on themselves, not worrying about who was better or what others thought of them.

Life is always speaking to us. Are we listening in order to hear?  Are we being observant enough to understand what the teachable moments are trying to tell us? I will tell you what I learned today while in that room: don’t worry if you match up to others. Use YOURSELF as a gauge and no one else. Get started and do YOUR best!

We can never think we have arrived. There is always more in us that is waiting if we push through. We must challenge ourselves constantly in order to grow. If we keep doing the same thing over and over our body adapts and we no longer get stronger. That goes for anything in life. We cannot become stagnant. It is easy and effortless to stay weak, but it takes a lot of effort, determination, willpower and courage to grow strong.

Are you where you want to be in your career, relationship, level of fitness, eating habits and so on? If you answered no to any of those questions, then I challenge you to do something about it. Don’t worry if you are not where you think you should be. Get started and you will see the changes you are looking for before you know it.

“If there is no struggle, there is no progress” Frederick Douglass

I invite you to click on the links below to watch two motivational videos:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qX9FSZJu448

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8jhcxOhIMAQ